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Erotic Cosmetics

Erotic Cosmetics are what you put on your skin for play: massage oils and candles, gels with a warming or cooling effect, delay products and pheromones. To choose, think about what you want (a massage, to feel more or to last longer) and check whether the product is compatible with latex condoms.

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What are Erotic Cosmetics?

These are products you apply to the skin to go with foreplay and sex, on your own or with a partner. Some are for giving a massage, others give a feeling of warmth, cold or tingling on the clitoris, nipples or penis, others flavour the skin or help you last longer, and pheromones are used like a perfume. Oils are for massage, not for lubrication: if you use latex condoms, keep the oil away from them. For penetration, see the lubricants section, and for washing and caring for the intimate area, the intimate hygiene one.

Types of erotic cosmetics

Each section groups products with a different use.

  • Sensitivity stimulators: gels and sprays that give warmth, cold or tingling on the nipples, clitoris or penis; some are made for oral sex.
  • Massage oils: for massaging the whole body; there are edible ones, ones with a warming effect and ones with CBD.
  • Pheromones: perfumes and roll-ons with pheromones, to wear on your skin like any other fragrance.
  • Massage candles: the wax melts into a warm oil that you pour onto the skin.
  • Erotic bath salts and gels: for the bath or shower before play, on your own or together.
  • Erotic creams and powders: creams for specific areas and body powders.
  • Edible erotic paints: for painting on the skin and licking off afterwards.
  • Female orgasm enhancers: gels and serums applied to the clitoris or vagina to feel the area more.
  • Male enhancers: creams, gels and capsules designed for erections and the penis.
  • Delay products: sprays and creams applied to the penis to take longer to reach orgasm.

What the studies say

The available studies are not about these products, but about massage and physical contact between partners, which is what oils and candles are for. In a study with fifty carers and 49 patients with cancer, a short massage workshop increased how often they gave massages (from 1.2 to 2.7 times a week) and how long they lasted (from 4.7 to 12.2 minutes), and the change was still there at three months (Collinge et al., 2007, J Soc Integr Oncol).

In three studies with couples, physical contact was associated with greater psychological well-being, regardless of how much or how little each person tended to avoid closeness (Debrot et al., 2021, Pers Soc Psychol Bull). This is an association: it does not show that contact is the cause.

Safety

If it is the first time you use a product, put a little on your forearm and wait a while to see whether it irritates. Warming or cooling gels should be applied in a small amount. Delay products can numb the skin of the penis a little: apply them a few minutes beforehand and wipe off any excess so it does not reach your partner.

How to choose

  • What it is for: for a massage, an oil or a massage candle; to feel more, a stimulating gel; to last longer, a delay product.
  • Edible: if there is going to be oral sex, choose an oil or gel that the product page says is edible.
  • Effect: the product page says whether it gives warmth, cold or tingling; if you have never tried one, start with a mild one.
  • Latex: if you use latex condoms, check on the product page that the product is compatible.
  • Ingredients: read the list if you have allergies, and for delay products check whether they contain an anaesthetic or are marked as anaesthetic-free.
  • Area of use: the product page says where it is applied (whole body, nipples, clitoris, penis or mouth).

Erotic Cosmetics: frequently asked questions

Can a massage oil be used as a lubricant?

It is not recommended: inside the body it can irritate and it weakens latex condoms. For penetration, use a water-based or silicone lubricant.

What is the difference between an edible oil and a massage oil?

An edible oil is made so you can kiss and lick the skin where it has been applied; an ordinary massage oil is not meant to be eaten. Both are for use on the skin.

How do you use a massage candle?

Light it for a few minutes until a little liquid wax forms, blow it out and pour the wax into your hand or onto the skin from a low height. Test the temperature on your wrist first.

Do pheromones work?

In people, there is little scientific evidence of their effect. Treat them as a perfume for the moment, not as something that will change how your partner reacts.

Can a delay product affect my partner?

Yes, if product containing an anaesthetic reaches them: the area may feel slightly numb. If you use a condom, put it on once the delay product has taken effect and you have wiped off the excess.

Can I use a warming gel on the clitoris?

Yes, if the product page says it is for that area. Use a very small amount, because on thinner skin the heat is felt much more.

Are male enhancers any use for erectile dysfunction?

No. They are cosmetics or supplements, not a treatment; if erection problems keep recurring, speak to a doctor. If you take any medication, ask before taking capsules or supplements.

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